Mi Familia – The Warmth in Your Group

I’m not talking about my mother and father. Or my brother. Heck not even my cousins, aunts, uncles, or grandparents! I’m talking about the women I dance with.

I’m starting to think about how I’ve found my group. My people. There is an intense comfort in that. I love them to bits, and there is an immediate bond, even between those who I have only just met. A dance troupe is a lot like a family!

I am so glad I tried belly dance. I encourage you to try something different. We had a young man in or class once, he was a boxer. He danced with us for a full year! Then he even came back to see us perform. Totally breaking the stereotype, and, while we may not have been his “group”, it surely helped him find a part of himself.

I think about moving in November, and the one thing I cannot let go of is the women I danced with. I didn’t get to spend enough time with them! Though I think I can move on to bigger things from here. I got a great foundation, was able to show myself that I am better than I thought I was. I got to be part of a REAL dance troupe and perform in front of what seemed to be the entire population of the small town we were performing in. (The population is approximately 15,000. So probably not actually all of them, but it was definitely in the thousands.)

Notice that I only said I was moving on to “bigger things” not “bigger and better things”. I truly believe that, even if I performed on a stage filled with pyrotechnics and fancy lights, I would consider it just as wonderful an experience, as dancing with these ladies, on the little pier jutting out into the bay.

I am sad I began saying my goodbyes to many of them tonight, but this experience, and the support of them, has made me excited for the future. I cannot express my love for them enough. I can only say, that when I came home tonight, and washed off all my makeup, I teared up a little thinking of saying bye.

Also, I found the woman who pushed me and showed me that I was a good dancer. Rather than saying it, she always just made me prove it to myself. It was the best way she could have done it too. By just telling me to do it! And it was fun the whole time. The teachers and leaders in the beginning, who set us up for the future, might matter the most.

But I know they’ll never really let me go, I might just be too far to join them.

M.I.A – Going Missing Can Be Good

I was supposed to upload a video yesterday. I did not. I think that it was important that I didn’t though. Clearly, for all my subscribers this isn’t a good thing, but it was a good thing for me.

You may know my husband is out of town for a prolonged period of time. My parents had also gone out of town the day after. While my brother was around for a bit, he too had to leave. I don’t blame any of them for not being around, but I definitely could have used a few of them. I managed to pull through and make a video though! A video I’m very proud of too. But with everyone gone, it was hard on me, and Wednesday, my parents came back!

I was going to release a video Thursday, but I didn’t. I didn’t, because it was more important to me – no, it was better for me – to be with my parents. I was able to nurture myself and feel less alone! So why not turn this into a lesson like all my other posts. If you need to disappear for a while, do it. Of course I love posting on this blog, and making videos, but at the end of the day it is work.

Now, I’m going to listen to some Skyhill, read Sherlock Holmes, and enjoy my evening. Videos will resume next week, and hopefully I can begin blogging more again.